Three Days Ago, God Handed Me a Gift

Some of you may...but then some of you may not...know that I am going to Costa Rica in two days. I leave Saturday morning around 4:30am, and I can not begin to tell you how excited I am!!!!

I have not been on a mission trip since summer '08, and I have been promising myself since last summer (when I took summer classes instead of doing Youth in Missions) that this was my summer. This year I would go on a mission trip.

..and then...

I felt like I was supposed to apply for an 8 week internship at Vanderbilt hospital through my school. So I did. And I got accepted...and that's what I have been doing 'till now. All the while, praying and searching for a trip that I could go on. The majority I found were in June or the first week of July...and I was working. Every team I tried to join was either full or going during the months of my internship.

I was disappointed and discouraged and had practically given up.

But then....

Sunday happened. There was an open spot on the Costa Rica trip that my church's youth group was going on. I sat in church and an unmistakable joy, peace, and sense of belonging settled on me.

You see, sometimes I forget..don't ask me how, but I do. I try to fill up my life with that all encompassing word "nursing;" with friends, with family, with balancing the varied and demanding aspects of my life, with trying to be all things for all people and falling so incredibly short. And nothing fits. Nothing makes me happy. But then...I hear it.

Missions.

It's my calling. And when I hear it, nothing else matters. It's like that scene in a movie where suddenly the actress is just standing there and you see everything rushing past so quickly that it's merely a blur of colors. And there's this calm.

That is what going on a missions trip does for me. It focuses me. It centers me; and everything else rushes by in a blur of unimportant colors. It brings me back to why I'm here and what I will eventually do. It's as though God hands me a gift and the card simply reads:

"Dottie, Remember."

Soooo...I have two and a half days to pack. And those of you who know me really well will be surprised if I start before Friday. But seriously, guys, I am going to start today. Promise!

I have already bought a backpack and a camera (a little one cause I did not want to take my big beautiful one because I will be working and not just sightseeing and it is kind of like my child and if it got hurt I might die) Here they are :)

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And now...I pack...stop laughing. Seriously, guys. It's not even funny.